Waldorf In The Home

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Listen More Speak Less

By nature I am a talker. I love to talk. Now I have two girls who love to talk and my husband who loves to talk, I know most people think my husband is a quiet kind of guy - but I can assure you he is not. Sometimes they all talk to me at once. So there has been some frustration in our house. Everyone has something to say to me at the same time. I try to step back and let them talk, but I realize that I  am not really listening to what they are saying  I was just waiting for them to finish so I could talk. I noticed this impatience of my family too. When they are asked to wait their turn they make a noise -  the sound one makes when they can barely hold their words in while someone else is speaking, they look like they are about to burst all the while the only thing they can think about is what they want to say.  This situation is not unique - I came from a family of talkers and I have sat in enough business meetings. Listening doesn't come naturally to me - it is an art that I am ready to learn. They may be telling me all about the wild rabbit in the backyard, but later when they need to talk but really need someone to just listen - I want to know how. I want to be approachable. I want to be in the moment with them. I want to listen more and speak less.  I have a note card that I hang where I can see it everyday  and it says  "Close your mouth and open your heart." I feel this is the best gift that I can teach my family. I want to hear about the wild rabbit in our back yard - even if it is the thousandth time. I must remember it is a blessing to have my children and husband to share their thoughts with me.

No more um-humming them. I am listening or at least trying.



  1. I am right there with you and I too am working hard on my listening skills. They are growing up so fast. I want them to always want to talk to me.

  2. what a beautiful and self reflective post Nichole... as a child development supervisor i can tell you that listening is the greatest gift we can give a child.. i have the opposite trouble -- i don't often enough express my opinion -- assuming what i have to say is not "that important" i guess we are all a work in progress--
    light and love to you... hugs :)

  3. It is always reassuring that I am not walking down a path alone even if I am walking north and you are walking south - it is that nod, or smile that makes the world a better place.

    Thanks for the love. Dawn - everything you have to say is important.

    Peace, Nicole

  4. I struggle with the same thing. The worst feeling is when my kids call me out for not listening.

  5. Hmmm, this was like reading a description of myself. I catch myself often on the verge or in the midst of interrupting. Coming from a family that is notorious for talking over one another, I'm finding this an extremely difficult habit to break. I'm a work in progress, for sure.

    Thanks for the lovely comment on my blog. To answer your question, I am originally from Strasburg in Lancaster County, PA, but we now live south of Cleveland, OH. My husband is from Titusville, PA. We travel across the state fairly often to visit family, so depending where you are, it would be lovely to meet up sometime!


Your comments kindle my spirit.